The Absurdist Revolutionary Party's Revolution Started Today. JOIN US!

Written by Nicholas Goroff, Co-Founder of the Absurdist Revolutionary Party A grand day comrades. Today, we announce to the world (actually, just to one another) our intentions. We stand now, at a crossroads. This election season, presents a choice unlike that which many of us have seen throughout the course of our lifetimes. As it stands, our choice in leadership has thus been choices between the lesser of two evils. We measure the standards of our government and our leaders according to the least of them to come before. No matter the measure of success or the severity of the situation, the American people are continually presented with choices of poisons, rather than of treats. And to protest this, meant only the satirical casting of one's revered franchise to a non-entity such as Micky Mouse, or the withholding thereof entirely. Well no more. Today, the Absurdist Revolutionary Party hereby proclaims itself to be the true and only home for America's protest vote. We stand by the principles that by no measure of insanity or absurdity, shall we ever be deemed less worthy of respect or reverence than those who should seek power, and in doing so present the most absurd of characters whilst demanding civil respect for doing so. We stand on principle that our union and collective will to expose the absurdity of our system, will better serve the people of this and all lands, by exposing the greater hypocrisy and corruption which demands itself be taken seriously. Through our jest and action and through our sheer determination, we shall make the farce that is American politics feel true shame through its reflection, in the hopes that one day we will find ourselves without need to mock those who seek stately office, as they shall themselves be statesmen, standing for what is true. Until this day should come however, we swear to this that we take this solemn, hysterical oath, by which the duty we've taken upon ourselves, to resist the lures of the partisan rancor and seek instead the greater hyperbole of all situations, shall be undertaken with clarity of mind and sharpness of wit, so that we might rid the world of such silly notions, as those that denote a difference in our parties. We swear before all that is holy, unholy and otherwise somewhat important, that we will be relentless in our pursuit of the absurd and poignant. That we shall not waste our wit for witty sake, but will ensure that our vision of a sensible, realistic world, which is of now, so absurd, be carried into the future and realized by our test tube clone children. The affixed digital social network signatures below (means your "like" it comrades) do so sign in solemn promise to stand with the Chairman and Revolutionaries throughout the globe, in supporting these goals and any proposed and ratified through the absurd process of democratic rule. The best way to currently join us is to log on to your facebook, and do a search for "Absurdist Revolutionary Party", and join up. Our month long Revolutionary Blood Oath Ceremony and Professionals Mixer started this evening.